As I lay in my bed Christmas eve morning it is still dark in my room due to the rain outside and H is still sleeping and the dog is cuddled up next to me, not quite ready to wake up himself just yet. I start to send my Merry Christmas love to some very important people in my life. One family in particular that has given me a best friend since high school and now her sister who has became my sole companion, the one I can't go without talking to. Although I miss my first best friend, Linz, we have drifted apart because of time, life, and distance. Although in my heart she will always be forever my best friend, somehow I was blessed enough to find a best friend in her sister, who lives across the street and is here.so when I think about it, this family was placed in my life 15 years ago for a reason, I just never would have thought that 15 years later this family touches my heart and life in ways that are indescribable. Not only did this family give me two wonderful women that I get to call my best friends but they always opened their home for me on holidays after my H would leave to be with her family. For the few years I did spend alone after H left I was sad, miserable, and normally drunk. Every Christmas or thanksgiving for at least the past 3 years if not 5 have opened their arms to letting me be apart of their Christmas night dinner and even thanksgiving meals. I'm not sure if any realize what they gave me when they did this or how much it touche me. I am not even sure I quite realized how much it meant to me until this morning. When I awoke it dawned on me I would not see this family this Christmas and my heart sunk and tears began to flow ( although let me be clear, they were not tears of sadness , but tears of happy thoughts/) I wrote on each ones wall to say Merry Christmas and thank you and to say how much I would miss them. This year they are all in TX where they belong together and I couldn't be happier that they all get to spend Christmas in TX together. I know how much this means to this family.I realized after I had written each one of them that my tears and feelings were way more than I had anticipated. Not only are they in Tx but this year Christmas is different for H and I. Now I have been blessed to have the most wonderful man come into my life and for the first time in 7 years H and I are going to spend Christmas with a family that is not ours. We were invited to spend Christmas eve with his family, and even though I'm a bit overwhelmed with this years change of events I realize that my life is taking a different turn and a new chapter is beginning, not only for me but for H as well. So to end this, this Christmas has been one I'll never forget, for the first time I am more in the Christmas spirit than I have been in what seems like ages, my TX family is in TX this year, and I start a new chapter in my life with this man I'm so madly in love with. Feeling more emotions than I could ever write down but thankful and blessed is what comes to mind. Merry Christmas 2012.
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